JACK (age 3) was watching his mom breast-feed his new baby sister. After a while he asked, “Mom, why have you got two? Is one for hot and one for cold milk?”
MELANIE (age 5) asked her granny how old she was. Granny replied she was so old she didn’t remember any more. Melanie said, “If you don’t remember, you must look in the back of your panties. Mine say five to six.”
STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his mom goodnight. “I love you so much that when you die, I’m going to bury you outside my bedroom window.”
BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a painkiller. She tried in vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her
frustration, her mom explained it was a childproof cap and she’d have to open it for her. Eyes wide with wonder, the
little girl asked, “How does it know it’s me?
SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. “Please don’t give me this juice again,” she said. “It makes
my teeth cough.”
D I (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked, “How much do I cost?”
MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young man and woman who were hugging and kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad, “Why is he whispering in her mouth?”
CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, “I don’t know what’ll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in?”
JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read, “The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out
of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt.” Concerned, James asked, “What happened to the flea?”
TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather wrinkled woman her mom knew. Tammy looked at her for a while and then asked, “Why doesn’t your skin fit your face?”
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Don’t brush your teeth, cough with your mouth open and wear ear plugs. That is what people do in planes beside me.
– where does wife fit into that? 🙁
16 and I kiss my mom goodnight every night. a girl though. I know if different for guys.
I better drink a glass of cold milk. I’m getting a sore throat. I always get sick when in the fall and winter. I am sick & tired of it. :-/
SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. ‘Please don’t give me this juice again,’ she said, ‘It makes my teeth cough.’
i had my tonsils out when i was a little girl. i know they don’t like removing them that much anymore.
Tax Joke of the Week: “The best measure of a man’s honesty isn’t his income tax return. It’s teh zero adjust on his bathroom scale.”